Seven Brides for Seven Brothers...

...or Satte Pe Satta. Other alternate title, "You healed me so I love you."

OMG, this takes the cake. While Ishq is in the lead for foolish bad behavior so far, the distinguishing feature of this film is its ludicrousness. That's not to say I didn't like it. I did. I'll probably watch it again, it's so ridiculous. But that was the point after all...

Satte Pe Satta is an even more dishoomi version of Seven Brides for Seven Brothers, the American musical made a film in 1954. I think I've said this before but I grew up on musicals. Mostly Rogers & Hammerstein but I remember liking this one when I was little. I think because there were so many people, so much dancing and several fights! Tons of fun I tell you! [Yes, I'm a cornball and not the least bit embarrased.] SPS is not so much a remake as an Indian interpretation of the story.

Amitbah Bachan plays the eldest of an unruly brood of brothers. He also plays the evil murderer guy who, well, gets enlisted to kill one of the girls. I really wanted to see him fight himself but I guess they didn't have the technology for all that...

Memorable items:

• Grown men in pastel-colored tighty-whiteys. (I know, I know. It's an oxymoron.)
• Fake beards in abundance.
• Random use of animal sounds by said grown men to express emotion or incite attention.
• Watermelon as a sign of love.
• Ab1 getting slapped. Hard.
• Love bourne of hate.
• Ab1 as a lush. Far too convincing. Dig that facial expression & the fetal position!
• Fight scenes that play out like circus shows. (lots of jumping and flying through the air)
• The only child of illegitimate parents whose wanderlust and inherent bent toward crime/violence is melted away by kindhearted country folk in an instant.
• And last but not least, WTH moment of the month: The relationship between a LARGE switchblade and a wheelchair-bound girl. There seems to be some inextricable neo-scientific link. [I'll not say what and potential ruin your opportunity to watch the moment unfold...]

Words of advice the characters in this film would do well to follow:

• Men, do not whistle with your fingers after relieving yourself outdoors. Just don't.
• Additionally, please do not throw your shotguns in the air as a sign of glee. I'm sure someone, somewhere learned this the hard way. You could be next.

As far as gender commentary, I think the lead female character in this was a bit like Snow White--moving into an filthy cottage to show the uncouth munchkins how to live. She cooks for them and does all the housework. <---Arguably regressive. At the same time, she has ALL of the men on smackdown so, I guess that makes them even. If only things were so easy in these perilous modern times...